Karma & Fred
by Colin Fisher
EXT. NEW YORK CITY STREET
It’s nighttime on a nice street in Manhattan, full of restaurants. KARMA and FRED are walking down the street hand in hand, trying to decide what to eat. She looks like a Wiccan hippie; he’s wearing a nice suit.
KARMA
How about Thai? It’s my favorite!
FRED
Oh Karma, you know I’m allergic to peanuts. They put them in everything!
KARMA
I’m sorry Fred, I totally forgot.
FRED
It’s OK sweetie. Brazilian steakhouse? You know how much I love meat.
KARMA
But I’m a vegetarian!
FRED
Right, right.
KARMA
We’re complete opposites!
FRED
That is the entire dynamic of our relationship, yes.
It starts to rain.
FRED
Oh shoot! I forgot my umbrella!
KARMA
Who needs an umbrella? Rain is just nature’s shower! And I haven’t bathed in weeks!
FRED
It’s going to ruin my suit! And my hair!
KARMA
Just let it happen! You’re not your suit! Or your hair!
FRED
Karma, I love your free-spirited nature.
KARMA
And I love your meticulous attention to detail.
FRED
But seriously I need to get under something. This is a $3000 suit.
KARMA
Oh, right.
They duck under an awning.
FRED
How about we just catch a movie instead?
KARMA
I’m more of a reader, really.
FRED
We could walk the High Line.
KARMA
I’m a staunch anti-cultivationalist.
FRED
Right. Well, any ideas?
KARMA
Wanna just go back home and fool around?
FRED
Karma, I’m gay.
KARMA
Right. Why are we together?
FRED
No idea.
END
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