National Sketch Writing Month #26

Previous Sketches

Moses & the Ten Commandments

by Colin Fisher

EXT. MOUNT SINAI

MOSES has been on the mountain getting the commandments from God.  He’s coming down a path with the two tablets in his arms.  He turns a corner and sees his people worshipping the golden calf, led by AARON.

MOSES

Yo!  What the hell guys?

Aaron jumps up and shushes at the Israelites, gesturing for them to cut it out.

AARON

Hey brother!  Good to see you again!

MOSES

Did you do this?

AARON

Well, sort of.  I mean, we all got pretty antsy, and we’re so used to worshipping stuff we just wanted to get our fix, you know?  You were gone for a while, man.

MOSES

Forty days, but we’ve been on the move way longer than that.  And I was up there talking to God.  GOD.  Remember him?  Creator of the universe?  The guy who totally screwed the pharaoh, and has actually been with us IN PHYSICAL FORM EVER SINCE?

ISRAELITE 1

Yeah, he’s great, but he’s been gone too and we weren’t sure if we’d see him again.

MOSES

Who cares if you never see him again?!  That doesn’t change the fact that he’s responsible for everything you see around you!  

ISRAELITE 2

Yeah, but, this is a golden calf.  It’s pretty.

MOSES

Are you serious with this stuff?!  It’s just gold!  It’s a big pile of gold that you shaped into something!  I’m talking about an actual, living god that you’ve seen with your own eyes.  

ISRAELITE 1

But, he’s not here right now.  

MOSES

I don’t know how I can make this any clearer to you people.  He just now told me ten rules, and this is literally one of the ten things we have to follow and you broke it.

AARON

Guys, he’s right.  You’re right bro.  We’re sorry.  It won’t happen again.  

MOSES

Thank you.  I appreciate that.  I’m sorry if I lost it.  It’s just he told me all this stuff we have to build and I’m carrying all these numbers in my head--

AARON

OK, slow down Moe, I wasn’t finished.  It won’t happen again, but we were just about to wrap up here so let me finish these prayers to this beautiful golden calf and we’ll get started on that little project.

Moses just looks at him for a second.

MOSES

Screw you guys.

He tosses the tablets down and they crack in two.  He sulks off.  Aaron looks at the rest of the Israelites.  Group shrug, then they go back to worshipping the calf.

END