Monday, February 2, 2009
NOW That's What I Call Evil!
In an alliance formed in the bowels of Hell, the middle-aged suits behind the NOW CD series (anthologizing forgettable music since 1999!) and the sadists that run American Idol are teaming up to bring us what we have not, in any way, been asking for: a pop music TV show in the vein of American Bandstand or TRL.
Simon Fuller, creator of American Idol and international war criminal, says "This show will unite the whole music industry and give it one voice." Because as we all know, his show and the NOW series display an eclectic range of influences, from crap to garbage.
Apparently a previous attempt to use the NOW brand in a TV show at NBC never even got off the ground. And TRL just ended its reign of homogenizing devilry. So these guys clearly have their fingers on the pulse of a dead horse.
Bob Mercer, head of NOW, wants the show to be a unifying force for the music industry to help fight the influence of the Internet, which has made it easier for people to form their own opinions and listen to what the want to listen to. And you know what? I think he'll succeed. He'll succeed in unifying everyone over 14 with an IQ above 80 in complete hatred. Best of luck, sir.
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thank you, jesus. between us weekly, the bible, fox news, access hollywood, apple commercials, and those billboards your dad created that say things like "one nation under me," i had no idea what i was supposed to think about the world around me. the inevitable butt-baby of simon fuller and bob mercer will surely be your second coming. hallelujah.
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