Fallen Weiner

Dammit, Weiner.

What's the thing where you end up doing something because it's so closely related to your name? It's like Crapper inventing a toilet. Lemme Wiki that...whoa, he invented the ballcock. That is unfortunately appropriate. You know what I mean though. Google "Dr. Butts proctologist." It happens.

Anyway, this is a guy who was serving as one of my last tethers to the current political atmosphere. I'd all but given up until some of his excellent Congress-floor tirades made the YouTube rounds. Were I in an elected position, I'd probably be doing the same thing. And he was Jon Stewart's roommate! Come on Weiner!

So at first I was like "eh, so he sent an oddly-angled picture of his stuff in some boxer-briefs. Weird. Whatevs." Then I was like "eh, so he engaged in some online affair business. It's not like he's a 'values' guy." Then I was like "oh, he's married. Gross. And just dumb."

No, he's not a values guy like Gingrich (explain how that works again?), but he's an ethics guy. He's a common-sense guy. He's a "look at yourselves you drooling morons" guy. This doesn't mean he can't do his job, and it doesn't mean his insight into the absurdity of his fellow leaders is much less clear. But it just takes him down a notch. It puts him on the same level as every other bumbling dude trying to run this show. Maybe that's what I get for putting any of them on a platform even a couple inches off the ground.

OK, Congresspeople, let's try an experiment. Everyone stand up. Now, have a seat if you're here representing corporate interests.

Wow. That was a lot of people. Alright, have a seat if you're not interested in helping those less fortunate.

Aaand that was almost all of you. Now, have a seat if you're ashamed of how far left you may be perceived.

Really? Just one guy left? OK. Have a seat if you can't seem to get anyone to listen to you.

Should you really be standing, Mr. Kucinich? That's what I thought.

Is this what it felt like when Bobby woke up on Dallas?